BEYHIVE stand up! I’ve been sippin’ on Lemonade just like everyone else. What a great album Queen Bey put together! I love when artists get really personal, that’s when they make the best music in my opinion. “Daddy Lessons” is one of my favorite songs on the album. In light of Father’s Day, listening to the song made me think about my dad and all the useful advice he’s given and continues to give me.
See my dad & I are basically twins. Some people say we look just alike (I don’t agree lol) but personality wise, Daddy & I are almost the exact same person. We’re both super type A people who enjoy making spreadsheets to keep our lives organized. Basically we’re control freaks lol. My dad serves as my financial adviser, grounding force and so much more. He gets on my last nerve sometimes but I’m pretty sure that I’m surviving adulthood because he’s now the little voice inside my head.
Being wiser and more experienced at navigating a world full of opposite personality types and having suffered the bumps and bruises, my dad often gives me really good advice about how to survive.
Here are just a few lessons he’s taught me over the years:
“Boys are dumb”. My dad taught me this lesson when I was in middle school. It was right on the cusp of that awkward time when everyone is bursting with new hormones and suddenly you think boys are maybe not so gross after all. I had a huge crush on one of my guy friends and he got me a stuffed animal for Valentines Day which I was really excited about. On a car ride with my dad he asked me about it. My awkward pubescent self wanted no parts of talking about boys with my DAD of all people (I still really don’t, super awkward lol). He turned to me in the passenger seat and said “Kiera, just remember that boys are dumb. They don’t know what they want and they mature slower than girls. Not a single one of them is worth crying over. And no one will ever love you like Daddy does”. I’m 23 now and his words still ring true. I actually found myself quoting him to a friend just the other day. “Boys are born every day” he jokingly says and he could not be more right. I’m super picky about who I date and talk to because my dad’s words are always in my head. That and my parents are the definition of relationship goals. They’ve been together for close to 30 years now and are still very much in love with each other. I want that and I am determined not to settle until I get it.
“You’re better than that”. The first time I vividly remember my dad saying these words to me was when I woke up to half of my math homework erased after I left it on the kitchen table for him to check when he got home from work. He’d write me notes about what I needed to fix before I went to school in the morning and a lot of time it was…“you should have erased better” or “this looked sloppy” and of course some help for wrong answers. I used to get really upset with him and argue that the other kids turned it in like that and the teacher didn’t care. He would always tell me he didn’t care about the other kids or the teacher, just that I was putting forth my best work. I used to be so annoyed with him but then my teachers started commenting on how neat my work was and using me as an example. I loved how that made me feel and next thing I knew a perfectionist was born. It started with math homework and learning the benefit of big block erasers but it taught me the importance of always putting my best foot forward and being the best version of myself that I could be. This has become a very important part of my personality and one that has proven very useful and valuable.
“Lack of planning on your part does not constitute emergency on mine”. I cannot tell you how many times I procrastinated science projects and then went to my parents a week before the deadline begging them to help me pull something together so I wouldn’t fail. There was the time I had the idea to grow plants but waited until the last minute. Or the time I needed my dad to help me build a functioning machine of some sort two nights before it was due. I’m sure I’m forgetting a couple others but I got my fair share of lectures for all of these incidents and they always included some version of “lack of planning on your part does not constitute emergency on mine”. My reaction was typically annoyance followed by panic and tears. Of course he helped me in the end but he always made me sweat it out. These were reminders that the world does not in fact revolve around me. They were also important lessons in time management and taking responsibility for producing a quality product in the given amount of time. Now I have everything planned out almost to the minute when I have due date and I haven’t had an incident like this in quite some time. I always hear those words in the back of my head. We even have a little sign of it in our house lol
So maybe my dad has turned me into a mini version of himself but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m a Type A perfectionist who craves control but I wouldn’t be where I am today if I hadn’t learned how to function. Today on Father’s Day all I really have to say is Thank You Daddy. Thanks for teaching me all these things and so much more. Thank you for helping me to always work at being the best version of myself. I love you! XOXO